I was bullied both in elementary school and in high school - but also later in life. There is no excuse for that but I've searched for answers to my question "why have I got be made fun of by my fellow students and even some teachers?" and I've come up with various "explanations". Because:
-I was (considered) a foreigner [xenophobia, racism]
- I was overweight
- I had excellent grades
- I was wearing glasses
- I was different
- I had uneven teeth
Here are some of the insults, threats, words, sentences etc. I remeber: "Scheißausländer/in", "Ausländer raus", "fette Sau/Kuh", "fettes Schwein", "mein Arsch, dein Gesicht", "zube cu ti poravnati" ...
One of my classmates in sixth and seventh grade called me "Detlef" (a man's name). I never asked him why. I did my best to ignore him. I guess that he tried to annoy me and tell me that I didn't "look like a girl" in his opinion and that he refused to call me by my name. He once asked me when me and my family (my parents and my brother) would leave Germany for good. Moreover, he picked on my because my dad used to drive me and my brother to school. A couple of years later his sister, who was older than me and who was my brother's classmate, was killed in an accident (she and some of her friends were returning home later after a party, they were walking on the side of the road when a drunken driver crashed into them). I felt sorry for his sister although I didn't know her and I wondered why he couldn't have lost his life instead of her even though he wasn't with her during this tragic night. I thought that the wrong sibling had died.
I've asked myself whether I have ever intentionally (consciously being mean to someone with the intention to hurt and harm them) bullied someone. I know that I have sometimes called some of the bullies names after they started insulting me.
No comments:
Post a Comment